The Milk of Human Stupidity

PETA is usually good for a laugh, but lately they've been good for little more than a nauseous shudder. Their latest crusade? to convince Ben and Jerry's to use human beast milk in their ice cream.

The fact that human adults consume huge quantities of dairy products made from milk that was meant for a baby cow just doesn't make sense," says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. "Everyone knows that 'the breast is best,' so Ben & Jerry's could do consumers and cows a big favor by making the switch to breast milk.

uh.... Why?

Using cow's milk for your ice cream is a hazard to your customer's health. Dairy products have been linked to juvenile diabetes, allergies, constipation, obesity, and prostate and ovarian cancer. . . it may play a role in anemia, allergies, and juvenile diabetes and in the long term, will set kids up for obesity and heart disease-America's number one cause of death.

So... linked by whom? and, human milk isn't dairy? and shouldn't someone warn the calves not to drink such dangerous stuff?

Animals will also benefit from the switch to breast milk. Like all mammals, cows only produce milk during and after pregnancy, so to be able to constantly milk them, cows are forcefully impregnated every nine months. After several years of living in filthy conditions and being forced to produce 10 times more milk than they would naturally, their exhausted bodies are turned into hamburgers or ground up for soup.

So... humans are mammals, and we should milk them instead? Wouldn't taking mothers' milk deprive human babies of something important? After all "the breast is best," right?

I must be missing something. PETA can't be that stupid, can they? Not to be indelicate, but I'm a father. I know about how much milk a human mother produces in a day, and it isn't 30 liters (the average for a dairy cow). I wonder how much a liter of milk would cost if PETA got its way?